Living with Honor

Learning to live from a standpoint of honor can be a challenge. The reason I say this is because honor is something we give because we are honorable. We don’t show honor because people are honorable. This can be the case but it is not always the case. Living with honor for all people means to value and respect others regardless of their life choices and regardless of their actions towards you. It’s easy to treat someone badly who has wrong you but to treat someone with honor who has wronged you is another thing. This is how character is developed.

Showing honor is treating people respectfully even if they have different beliefs than you do, such as religious beliefs. It’s hard for us to understand someone who has different beliefs than we do and we generally do not understand something that is different. This is where it can be a challenge to value what we don’t understand. Honoring is showing value for what we don’t understand. It is withholding judgment against someone because they have a different set of values. Judgment is very easy to fall in to. Most of us would say we are not being judgmental, however, most of us do judge other people’s actions. It’s one thing to say we do not agree with their actions. Judgment comes in when we say they shouldn’t have done that or they shouldn’t act that way. And really, who are we to say that someone should or shouldn’t behave a certain way unless we have lived the life they have lived.

I believe judgment comes from our life experiences and what we have been taught to be right and wrong. Whether we have learned from our parents, work or friends, they are all life experiences which have taught us what we should value. If someone else’s values do not line up, it is easy to judge someone’s behavior. As judgment enters our thoughts, honor is affected. It could be a look, a thought or an action that shows someone that we do not honor them.

To honor is to value what we don’t understand, respect people for where they are at in life and withhold judgment. This is something I am striving for in my life. I believe as a social worker, this is the most character trait that we must exhibit.  This is the underlying action that empowers the people that we will work with. We can address the strengths, be there for them and refer them to all of the necessary resources but if we don’t honor them, it will not be received well and will not feel genuine to them.